Taped from Hershey, PA let’s talk some smack…
Teddy Long talked about how Smackdown won the draft lottery. Sure they did. I love how the crowd was completely dead during his exciting promo. Maybe it’s because nobody has any reason to believe in this draft because it’s rare that people stay exclusive to a show anymore.
Before we got Jericho vs. Kingston, Jericho talked about how he said he’d become the face of SD and he did that. Now he’s off to conquer Raw again. Yes, off to conquer the show where just three months ago he was cutting promos about not being on it again. This is why nobody cares about the draft lottery. I’ll miss Jericho on SD, but Raw needs him. I’m cool with it as long as they put him on long matches on that show. I know that’s asking for a lot.
Kofi Kingston d. Chris Jericho (**3/4)
This was a fun match that got about 10 minutes. Told a decent story with Jericho on offense for much of him. He hit the Codebreaker, but Kofi fell out to the floor. Jericho scrambled to get him in only to get a two count. That’s a good way to protect the move while also showing Kofi’s resilience. The finish saw Kofi hit the Trouble in Paradise kick for the win. I guess you could say it was OUT OF NOWHERE~!, but I was kind of glad we didn’t hear that. Jericho losing on his way off Smackdown became a trend through the show.
The first of several Swagger clips aired of him saying he got to meet George Bush, the greatest president of all time. Boos for that. These were so ’80s that I loved them.
Jericho walked backstage. Spoke to somebody off screen in a derogatory. Turns out it was the new babyface on Smackdown, Big Show. He KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT~! of Jericho.
Chavo came out, cut a promo about being back on SD. Kane came out, chokeslam. “Welcome back.” This wasn’t good, but it’s still way better than the shit Chavo had to do on Raw. Glad he’s on SD.
Shad “I wear a suit now because I’m a heel” Gaspard said it’s his time. Yes, his time to not have a much, but to cut a backstage promo. You tell ’em, chief.
Cody Rhodes d. John Morrison (**1/2)
They got about 11 minutes, which is probably more than Cody ever had in a singles match on Raw. The problem was the crowd was absolutely dead for this aside from the few comeback attempts by Morrison. Rhodes is fine as a worker. He’s made a lot of strides in the last couple of years especially, but there’s no reaction to him. Also, could they get him a video that doesn’t have the “Legacy” logo in it? The match ended with his Cross Rhodes finisher that many others in wrestling have used. Morrison is another former Smackdown guy losing on his way out. I don’t agree with Morrison going to Raw. He won’t have the good matches there that he had on SD.
More Swagger talking about his national championships. Is it all true? Who knows? It’s good for heel heat.
Time for my favorite part of the show. Edge came out (after Tony Chimel’s voice cracked saying “Rated R Superstar”) saying how sad he was about leaving Smackdown for Raw because he had done so much on SD. He thanked the fans, which brought out a new Smackdown guy in Christian. What a run on Raw he had, huh? We’re apparently supposed to forget that WWE called them “brothers” from about 1998 to 2002, by the way. They’re now best friends since grade six, which they actually are. It’s just that if you say they’re brothers for a period of five years and then never mention it again you’re insulting fans that actually remember things. It was cool seeing them together. They have great chemistry. Hell, I think they even have the same shoes on. Anyway, Christian calls Edge a liar, says he never cared about the fans and he used Christian to get the top. That’s a different view of history since Edge got his biggest push when Christian was in TNA, but again I’m thinking too much. The emotion of what they said was good. Edge mentioned all his title reigns while Christian said he has not done it…yet. Way to put over ECW! I liked the intensity of it. I wish the crowd did a better job of Edge turning heel again, but they did not. Still, they did pop for Christian and the things he was saying. They liked his idea of seeing Edge vs. Christian rather than Edge and Christian. Edge said no like the cowardly heel that he is. They had a little fight, Edge bailed and Christian led the crowd in singing “na na na hey hey goodbye” on Edge’s way off of Smackdown. I enjoyed the segment. Could have been better? Sure. I liked it, though. I’ve seen these two perform since their indy days, so I marked out just a little bit. Could they do a match down the road? I hope so.
By the way, I didn’t think they’d turn Edge heel this soon. I guess they felt his face run wasn’t getting anywhere and he felt more comfortable in the heel role. I’m okay with it. It feels a bit sudden, though.
Backstage, Edge told Josh that he doubts we’ll see E vs. C because C knows how it would go down. Cue Big Show. He KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT~! of Edge being on Smackdown.
Kelly & Beth d. Michelle & Layla (1/2*)
Typical three minute divas tag. I love how Striker tried to put over Kelly’s life story. Wasn’t she hired by WWE when she was 18? Are we allowed to remember that they booked her as a stripper immediately upon getting hired? Her life story before WWE was high school. Exciting huh? Kelly was on offense, she got beat up, Beth got the hot tag, cleaned house and Kelly won with a legdrop to the back of the head. Another new Smackdown person going over. At least Kelly didn’t screw any spots up. That’s a positive.
Backstage, Chris Masters did his titty dance to the Smackdown theme. Yes, it actually happened. And Vince McMahon thought it was great. And I wish I was drunk.
In another pointless segment, Dolph Ziggler came out to ringside, showed a clip of Hornswoggle in the sleeper in Leprechaun Heaven. In other words, Hornswoggle will cost Dolph a match next week. I’d rather see a man make his boobs dance.
Backstage, Matt Hardy talked and got beat up by Drew McIntyre again. I guess that eventually Matt will come back to take the IC title from him. It’s nice to see long term angles, at least.
Now JTG cuts a problem. See, he’s not a heel, so he can dress normal. He says he’s going to win some gold. I’d bet against that.
In ring, CM Punk, Gallows & Serena came out to run down the fans like usual. Cue new SD guy MVP. He says Punk has killed the fun on Smackdown and now that MVP’s there he’ll make it fun again. They brawled a bit. Mysterio made a save and that led to the tag match.
MVP & Rey Mysterio d. CM Punk & Luke Gallows (*1/2)
Take a guess who won? Yes, the Raw superstar that got drafted to Smackdown. Shocking, huh? It only went about five minutes. Mysterio hit the 619 and then MVP hit his finisher for the pin on Gallows. I’ll assume this leads to more tag matches between these guys. MVP vs. Punk would definitely elevate MVP although I think MVP’s better off as a heel at this point.
Swagger said he graduated with a 4.0 GPA. Not true, but I’m sure WWE will say it enough that people believe it.
The “main event” saw Swagger come out, cut a promo about his greatness and that brought out Teddy Long. He announced the new number one contender, Big Show. Show came out to the ring and the fans actually started chanting “Knock Him Out” while they were face to face. See, that’s a chant that could work. Show mentioned Jack’s accomplishments and wanted to add one more for him: Early retirement. What does that mean? The KNOCK THE FUCK OUT~! punch. I really do enjoy it. The show ended with Swagger kissing the canvas.
Three Stars of the Show
1. Christian – He mentioned not being a World Champion…yet. Make it happen.
2. Kofi Kingston – I’m sure he’s happy to be off Raw. He performed well.
3. Chris Jericho – Just because I’ll miss him on SD and he’ll “never” be on again. Right.
6.5 out of 10
Last week: 7
I liked it for the most part. There was a running theme with the new Smackdown people going over in their “debuts” on the show. They gave the matches a decent amount of time, which is typical of what we always get on SD. Some of the segments were pretty bad (Masters, Chavo, Ziggler, JTG, Shad) and came off as filler just to get everybody on the show. It’s not typical of what we usually get. As always, though, the quality wrestling was enough to carry it.
The first Smackdown without Funaki. Sigh. That was so hard to get through.
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