By Jeremy Peeples, WrestlingObserver.com
Last week, Kurt Angle beat Rockstar Spud to defend his title to start the show and went on to beat Austin Aries in the main event as well. Crimson returned and beat the re-re-re-re-re-signed Bram, whose TNA future is bright and quite secure. Tonight, EC3 faces an opponent of Kurt Angle’s choosing, and we’ll get a contract signing for Angle vs. EC3.
The show begins with a stellar tribute video to Dusty Rhodes. Beyond a still graphic, we get NWA clips along with him running wild in the earlier days of TNA. An Angle-EC3 video package starts things off as we see Pope in a new kind of horrible black and white shirt and Tenay is mid-ring for the EC3-Angle contract signing. Mike Tenay introduced EC3, who comes out in a skin-tight white shirt that looks ridiculous.
Kurt comes down and Josh announces that on July 1, Angle will face EC3 at the “Bell to Bell” Impact. EC3 says that Kurt’s beaten next big things, nature boys, rated R superstars, dead men, immortals, cerebral assassins, and guys you can’t even see. Submission machines, charismatic enigmas, kings of mountains, and what they have in common is that they’ve been beaten – and EC3 hasn’t. Boom. This was exactly how you put over your guys instead of another company’s. Kurt says that it’s all true, but he’s been here before, and when EC3 loses to him, he’ll crumble. Kurt says that tonight, EC3’s tune-up match will be against Lashley, who walks down the aisle.
Next week, we get Low-Ki vs. Grado vs. Tigre Uno for the X Title. Recap of the tag title series. The Wolves come down to talk about the series. Davey says that whoever holds the gold is the best in the world. They beat the Bro Mans, the Hardys, and Team 3D and beat them – even with tables, ladders, and chairs involved. Eddie wants match four tonight, while Roode says Aries isn’t cleared and the Dirty Heels call the shots here. They challenge him to a one on one match, and Roode says no unless they agree to his terms. The winner of the match gets to pick the stipulation for match four of the series. Davey’s all for it and wants to kick the crap out of him, but Eddie wants the match since Roode hit him with a chair. An all-new ad for Impact on Destination America airs, hyping up next week’s “live” show.
Match One – Bobby Roode vs. Eddie Edwards
Roode clubs Eddie to start things off. Eddie avoids a charge by Roode and gets a suicide dive. Eddie chops away on the floor and sends Roode in, who comes back with punches and corner kicks. Josh says that a limited number of travel packages are available and Eddie gets a shining wizard for 2. Roode slams him down and gets a kneedrop and chops. Roode snapmares him and chinlocks him. Roode gets a corner lariat, but Eddie comes back with a leg lariat as pope calls Angle-Aries the match of the year. Josh tells everyone to check out TNA’s Youtube channel for a five star match. Mid-ring chop and forearm exchange leads to a corner machine gun chop by Eddie. Backpack stunner gets 2 for Eddie. Double stomp misses and Roode gets a spinebuster for 2. Davey comes down, as does Aries while Roode tries to use a chair and Eddie wins via distraction schoolboy. Davey makes Match four Full Metal Mayhem.
A new voiceover guy blandly talks about Lashley being the destroyer while clips of him destroying dudes are shown. JB says he was going to interview Bram’s opponent, but no one showed up. Joseph Park shows up says he lost his teeth, his spot on the Impact roster, his law firm, and he invested the rest of his money in Tout. HA! Joseph Park is so much more fun than Abyss now. Bram attacks a camera man for filming him. Drew Galloway tells everyone to Show Your Impact, which sounds like an arrestable offense in most states. Bram comes down and Josh recaps Bram beating Crimson. Joseph Park has gone from his Under Armour gear and is now down to Wal-Mart workout gear. Pope says that Park never really looked like he had money, so this doesn’t hurt him much. Park tells Bram that his actions are felonious, so Bram assaults him.
Match Two – Joseph Park vs. Bram
Bram punches away and rakes the face in the corner. Park comes back with corner punches, but eats more punches while Josh calls Bram “The Plague of Chesterfield”. Bram gets a chair, but Park double-legs him like a 10 year old and punches away like a six year old. Pope says that Park’s punches are great, while Josh says he’s in a boxing hall of fame, so how can he say that. Bram gets a kendo stick, which Park uses on him after a low blow. A chokeslam gets 2. Oh, and these are no DQ matches by the way – Josh just alerted us to that. Park eats a spear through the table for a loss – this was fun. Taryn listens to her theme and says that she has made a wacky stipulation match – if Kong and Brooke beat the Dolls, they can each get a shot at her title, but if they lose, neither can get a shot. Josh said he’d explain Taryn’s explanation next. A vignette airs telling us the world is burning and the wicked will pay for injustice.
We get a recap of tonight’s Kurt-EC3 stuff. The Dollhouse comes down and Josh calls Taryn a genius. Jade and Marti jump Brooke as she comes down, but Kong’s theme hits and stops them in their tracks. Kong attacks Marti, but Taryn attacks from behind before the bell.
Match Three – The Dolls vs. Brooke’s Gotta Booty and Kong’s Gotta Powerbomb
Brooke and Marti start it on the floor and Kong attacks Jade mid-ring. Josh is now a face while Pope sides with the heels and Josh buries Pope for being a heel after siding with them other times tonight. Ugh. Jade hair mares Brooke into the corner and tags Marti in. Josh says that Taryn will beat Gail’s record as champion, and Pope says he’s going to hand-deliver roses to her personally. The heels attack while the commentators talk about evites to the party. Brooke elbows Jade, but eats an axe kick. Josh plugs BBQ Pitmasters and Brooke gets more forearms and elbows. Marti comes in and rains down mounted punches. Jade gets a suplex and does a sitting jump for joy and gets 2. Jade misses a lionsault while Pope talks about Kong going by that name because it is rooted in royalty.
Kong comes in and slams away. She goes for the Awesome bomb, but Jade dropkicks her. Kong suplexes both Dolls down. Brooke spears Jade, while Kong chokeslams Marti. Brooke gets a flying elbow off of Kong’s shoulders, so they each get a title shot at Taryn. This was fun, and while Kong isn’t anywhere near what she was seven years ago, she still has an aura. Pope says to get a paramedic because that elbow might’ve exploded something on Marti. Jade carries Marti away and Josh talks about the history of EY and Chris Melendez before Melendez calls out EY next.
Full Metal Mayhem is announced for next week’s show. Christy Hemme welcomes Melendez out to the ring. Melendez says he sacrificed a lot, and EY comes out and says he doesn’t care what Melendez did. EY is world class, and Melendez is at the bottom in wrestling. Melendez wants a match next week and EY accepts. Well, this was short and sweet. After a break, Jessie comes out to a new sinister theme song. DJZ comes out to fight.
Match Four – Jessie Godderz vs. DJZ
DJZ runs wild with strikes and then does two flips for a jawbreaker. Jessie gets a punch and a pieface before laying DJZ out with a powerbomb. Josh says that Magnus would be here later to talk about Storm’s near-criminal actions, before saying that it was criminal since he shoved her off a train platform. Jessie tosses DJZ hard into the corner before getting the Adonis Crab for the win. A basic Boston crab was put over as a finish in 2015 – I like it, it’s not how dangerous the move is, but how dangerous you teach the fans it is. Jessie says he’s the reason the Bro Mans won the titles twice, while stomping away at DJZ. Jessie cut a nice, sinister promo here and he’s got something mixing in a bit of comedy during the Bro Mans portions of it. Jessie goes for the over the top press slam, but Robbie makes the save with some Thesz press punches. This greatly over-delivered.
We get a recap of the Storm-Mickie train station thing, but they didn’t mute the audio – so you can barely hear Josh or whoever was speaking in the clip. Magnus will be in the ring to talk and/or kick some ass next. But first, we get an ad for Slammiversary. Magnus comes out in jeans and a tanktop without his theme and grabs the mic from Christy. He says he’ll crack heads until Storm comes down. Security comes down and Magnus threatens Bob Ryder, Dixie, and Big John – he won’t give them the show back until he gets Storm. Storm thankfully obliges and comes down. He says that he wasn’t the bad guy, Magnus was.
Magnus was jealous of him for getting attention from Mickie, and it was Magnus who hired a camera crew while Storm asks what happened when the cameras weren’t rolling. Storm brings out a baby carriage and says Mickie’s a sorry excuse for a woman, and Magnus is a sorry man. They fight on the ramp and Magnus lays out security while Storm pushes the carriage off and Magnus reveals it’s a doll and Josh just treats it like nothing. They jump right to the announcing motel room about two frames after revealing that it’s a doll. EC3 hype video sets up the main event. EC3 comes out and Josh, who earlier ranted about heel announcers, was a heel announcer here. Lashley comes out and they cut away during the intro for an ad break.
Main Event – EC3 vs. Lashley
Lashley powers EC3 into the corner, and EC3 hides behind the rope for a bit. EC3 punches him and it gets no reaction. Lashley leapfrogs him and gets a lariat before some shoulder charges. Corner punches from Lashley while Josh wants the marquee to say that EC3 has been unbeaten. Josh tells Tyrus to earn his check by guarding EC3 on the floor. EC3 gets a baseball slide while Pope says that Tyrus is the man dinosaur and Josh says he loved him in Jurassic World. EC3 suplexes Lashley on the floor before getting a mid-ring chinlock.
They exchange punches, but EC3 gets a bad-looking flying knee for 2. EC3 gets a chair, but the ref gets it and EC3 punches him some more. Tyrus puts the chair in the corner, but Lashley knocks it down while Josh says that Earl hasn’t called for a DQ in 2015. Yup, blame the ref for bad booking. EC3 gets out of a torture rack, but eats a powerslam for 2. EC3 avoids a corner spear and sends Lashley into the chair for 2 after a DDT. Lashley gets the spear, but Earl’s down and Tyrus attacks Tyrus. Brian Hebner runs in and counts 2, so Tyrus takes out Brian. Shouldn’t this be a DQ too? If it’s all Earl’s fault, why isn’t this a DQ? Tyrus attacks another ref who counts 2, so Lashley spears Tyrus. Lashley hits a chair to the back, gets the headlock driver and Earl counts three. Josh says that EC3 has been undefeated for 598 days while Tyrus holds EC3’s hand high. This was a pretty good show overall despite not having the best lineup.
To see every screenshot taken for the show, just click here.
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